Saturday, December 17, 2011

Through Nature's Eyes (Pt I)

Hi all,

I am doing something a little different diving into a new short story. I hope you enjoy my latest work and stay tuned!!

Mel exposed herself in the winter air. At first, it was a naked arm dangling from her wool pajamas. It was turning raw pink then blue. She felt a streak of defiance. Her mother was not there to scold her. They were the sort of rebellious streaks most people would scoff at: mismatched socks; the left side was accustomed to polka dots and the right preferred bold stripes. Then, she graduated to bare feet. Her toes were not adverse to a sticky dorm room. She was proud of the messes left over from breakfast. She liked soggy corn puffs and milk in a pool she could step in. She wouldn’t want her mother to see her with a raccoon nest for hair, where remnants of dinner, a pencil, and notes from class had slept together and cooed.

Her roommate thought she was nuts, sporting nothing except bare legs and her boyfriend’s oversize hoodie. Wish I had a hoodie to slide in, Mel thought. Boys aren’t in season, ripe on trees, or falling from the sky.

A snowflake smiled at her through the window. Then, a pair of long pink ears tapped against her window.....


poetrymatters said...

This is good!

Darryl Fabia said...

I liked this one a lot; it felt very focused on Mel, right where it should.

septembermom said...

Very good. I love how you use the imagery in a thoughtful way throughout your prose. That nice poetic touch always :)