Saturday, June 13, 2009

The Reaper (Pt IX)

He was drawn to the field where his father toiled. His feet tread heavily on the grass; the blades cut against him like knives. He watched his father with his eyes, bending and twisting in dirt. The sower recognized his own blood and beckoned him with the motion of his index finger.

Kadin walked closer but with every step, he felt a weight grip him. Opening the palms of Kadin's hands, the sower rested his hot forehead. His mind split open and all of his memories spread out like the pages of a book. He was careful not to disturb his father, nestling in the bed of sleep like a moth in a cocoon.

His father's memories flickered like fireflies at midnight. The first image appeared as his mother. Her skin gleaned like a golden goddess and fire blazed on the tip of her hair. He beheld her in the glory of her youth, and Kadin understood why his father became enraptured with her.

A young, gallant man trailed her. He was astonished to see the young candor in his father. The arch in his spine became invisible. He watched while the sun rose in their spirits and promise kissed their fingertips.

He witnessed his mother's belly grow like a watermelon and he and his sister came marching out. Blessings and happiness were bestowed upon the family.

Then a portentous cloud rose from the west and thrashed about their dwelling. Afterward, the ground dried up and the sky refused to rain. Here, was the great famine that sent his father from his home. Tears stained the cheeks of the little ones. How Kadin longed to comfort his sister.

Slowly, his father retreated and sorrow swallowed him up like the wind. He exhaled and the past dissipated in the darkness.


Arija said...

beautiful content, I was quite fascinated thtroughout. Needs a little honing here and there of a word or two to smoothe the flow of words. Good prose is as hard to write as poetry.

Kilauea Poetry said...

Well, I liked this..and these lines-
"The arch in his spine became invisible..
He beheld her in the glory of her youth" Don't know if I could be a big help at critiquing..and maybe cause I'm my own worst critic..I'm sure all the imput is helpful.
Oh..I kind of like being taken back to the father.. "He exhaled and the past dissipated in the darkness" Nice-

Anonymous said...

Love the second paragraph "His mind split open... like the pages of a book". Kadin was able to step back in time and feel his father's emotions as he held his head in his hands just beautiful. This story moves along beautiful if your not will to think alittle your not ready to enjoy a good read!! WG this is a very good read just the way it is!!:p Great Job

workerv said...

I love the way you took us back to the good
old days, the richness of the family before
the famine. Struggles defines more often who
we are, sometimes even in over coming there
is a change that mars our chracter, bitter-
ness. Kadin recognizes what poverty does to
the inner man. we see a bit of self here,
our selves.